Here comes Ted with his best friend Fred
Coming up the avenue
Here comes Mike and you look just like him
Up and down the avenue

Those guys stay up on the partyline
They make you cry in every way that you can
Those guys have money for you anytime
But you never make out with them, yeah

Here comes Brady with his fifty dollar baby
Comin' out the alleyway
And here come Davey with his funny little lady
Wiping all her tears away

Oh, those guys may cause you to fantasize
They make you cry, they make you comply like a man
Those guys have money for you anytime
But you never make out with them

Making out with the funny little lady
What choo' gonna do right now
Making love with the funny little woman
Don't you want to take me down
Alright yeah

Those guys stay up on the partyline
They make you cry in every way that you can
Those guys have money for you anytime
But you never make out with them